What is Friendship?

As expected, it took me quite a while to finish the last blog. My fingers were also sore after writing just 500 words. So today I switch to English.

While I was swimming this morning, a thought suddenly occurred to me. (That’s my habit. I dream when I am swimming, or driving!! Sounds a bit dangerous, right?)

The question is “What is friendship?”


There are at least four levels of friendship, or maybe more.

Business Friends – They get together because of business or personal interests. As soon as business interest disappears, the friendship will be gone like leaves blown away by gusty wind.

Friends – They share common interests and enjoy getting together, usually in a bigger group. Topics of their discussion stay at a ‘friendly’ level such as business, career, and living. Souls searching topics, personal issues, or other things at a deeper level may sometimes be shared, but not really getting through. In the end they stopped and are happy to stay as friends.

Best Friends – Their trust and understanding of each other is beyond the level of friends. In their conversation they touch on deeper topics – family, relationship, world view and even spiritual. They have a deep knowledge of each other. They always try to find ways to please each other, and want only happiness for the other party. They are soul mates. They are usually of the same gender, but occasionally between different genders.

Romantic Friends – Their relationship is of romantic nature. I think there is no need for me to elaborate.

They are like a pyramid. One usually has lot of business friends, some friends, very few best friends, and one or two romantic friends.

The above is analysis, the work of my head. Unfortunately it’s more art than science to manage friendship in real life. If friendship is an art I don’t think I’m a good artist. This is especially tricky between different genders. Looking back over the years, I’ve made lots of mistakes – some light, some serious. The safest bet is to withdraw, limiting all your friends to the lowest level (i.e. business friends). You will never get hurt this way. However if you see friendship as an adventure, you will also lose a lot of opportunities to build up meaningful friendship which brings your joy, happiness, and contentment.

Stand back or venture out? It’s your choice.